Influencer Molly Rutter’s TikTok controversy: Is she a lolcow or just another exploitative creator?
While tradwives, AI Disney filters, and candy salads have all become permanent fixtures in TikTok’s algorithm, there’s one content category that still reigns supreme: DateTok. Whether it’s lamenting over a failed first date or debriefing after a successful one, some of the most popular creators on the app dedicate their entire pages to the ups and downs of dating. Molly Rutter is one such creator. Recently, however, the influencer found herself at the centre of controversy after she knowingly exploited her very loyal following….
#DateTok has never been without its flaws and this recent scandal comes at a time when people are reconsidering whether or not it’s healthy to share every intimate dating moment with millions of strangers online. So, without further ado, let’s discuss the Rutter case and exactly why it’s understandably upset not just her followers, but the entire TikTok community.
Who is Molly Rutter?
Molly Rutter is a content creator with over 150,000 followers on TikTok. As previously mentioned, aside from a few vlogs and OOTDs, her page primarily focuses on documenting everything about modern-day dating, from the high and lows to the truly cringe-worthy moments.
@molly.rutter We’re gonna need a storytime for this one 🫨 #firstdate #datingstorytime
♬ original sound - Molly Rutter
@molly.rutter This is how a 28 year old acted 😩 #datingstorytime #firstdate #firstdatefail #datinginyour30s
♬ original sound - Molly Rutter
@molly.rutter You’re not gonna believe the plot twist in this one!! 👶🏽#datingstorytime #datingtiktok
♬ original sound - Molly Rutter
It’s important to note that one of the reasons Rutter is so popular in the DateTok community is because she is always incredibly vulnerable with her audience. On a number of occasions, the influencer has opened up about feeling unsafe or uncomfortable on certain dates—an element of her storytelling that has been applauded by her followers.
So, given that context, you can imagine people’s genuine fear and concern when Rutter posted a typical pre-date vlog that concluded with a five second clip of the influencer looking bruised or beaten, surrounded by blue flashing lights, looking visibly shaken up onscreen, and telling viewers “this was the scariest date of my life.”
Rutter’s followers had to wait hours for an update, with many of them legitimately worried about the influencer’s well-being. When she finally posted a follow-up video, she revealed that she was perfectly fine, and that the entire situation had been a marketing ploy. It turned out she had actually spent her evening at one of the biggest haunted houses in America…
Immediately, netizens began criticising Rutter’s blatant irresponsibility. How dare she exploit her followers’ genuine care and concern like that? The entire thing felt incredibly gross and in poor taste.
Indeed, one creator, @nat.thewitch, who responded to the controversy, insightfully stated: “[Rutter’s] marketing tactic was to tie in the parasocial relationship that her audience has with her. Her brand is her personal life and part of that has become her dating woes including some sincere and dangerous situations that it seems she has been in that I feel very bad for her. People are already protective of her because they’ve seen her go through violence in her real life on dates and they trust that she takes that seriously.”
“So then to turn around and market to those same people in an undisclosed brand partnership by clickbaiting them into thinking you have just experienced domestic violence, it’s so uniquely sinister,” the creator continued.
In perfect TikTok etiquette, Rutter deleted the videos shortly after and released a number of public apologies, expressing her regret and clarifying that it was not a paid partnership.
@molly.rutter This is my personal response to the videos I posted and have since removed. I also want to clarify this was not a paid partnership.
♬ original sound - Molly Rutter
However, the ickiness of the event stuck with people and it prompted others to consider whether or not Rutter’s content, aka dating content, is inherently healthy:
@therealebjohnson Be wary of content that has no end. #mollyrutter #escalation #narctok #narcissistic #narcissism #domesticabuseawareness #socialmediatips #stunts
♬ Chopin Nocturne No. 2 Piano Mono - moshimo sound design
@tfay_10 Not to say that I saw this coming…… but I saw this coming #mollyrutter #dating #firstdate #dv #dvawareness #viral #foryou #fyp #foryoupage #fypシ
♬ original sound - T
Now, I’m going to go onto a slight tangent in the next section but I promise it’s relevant. Stay with me.
What is a lolcow?
A lolcow refers to someone whose internet presence is deemed as highly exploitable. Typically, a lolcow is an individual whose eccentric or bizarre behaviour online amuses audiences in a rather unhealthy way. Long story short, people are often laughing at them as opposed to laughing with them.
@r4tb1tch The internet mightve been a mistake #fyppppppppppppppppppppppp #lol #cow
♬ Dove doll version - ໒꒰ˆമ ˕ മˆ꒱১
The reason I mention this term is because some netizens have now begun wondering whether or not Rutter fits that label and if her own audience has inadvertently prompted her to act this way:
@caracarebearrr ♬ original sound - Cara
While this is an interesting argument—and a lot of people online definitely cosigned this theory—it does remove most of the responsibility from Rutter herself.
Whether Rutter is a lolcow or not, it’s evident that the videos she recently made legitimately upset and offended several people who’ve been loyal followers for some time. Dating content can be fun and empowering in so many ways, let’s not allow it to become exploitative.
