What is the Gen Z stare, and why are millennials on TikTok so bothered by it?
The only appropriate reply to “Can I get that iced coffee hot?” is with a ‘Gen Z stare’, according to the latest TikTok debate.
Generations are butting heads over this customer service stare. Millennials are saying that younger workers are greeting customers and colleagues with wide eyes, blank expressions, and elongated pauses.
Some say the stunted interactions are due to social anxiety, Gen Z not knowing how to talk to people, or the after-effects of the pandemic. As more of the generation enters the workforce, it seems people have strong opinions when it comes to how Gen Z are interacting.
But, as TikTok creator @thisisjenae explained in a video on the topic: “‘Oh Gen Z just do the Gen Z stare, they don’t know how to talk to people.’ Fair, a lot of Gen Z don’t know how to talk to people. But a lot of older generations talk too much, too rudely, too proudly, while being too stupid.”
The creator also mentioned an example when someone once “got mad at me for their ice tea being too cold.” When interactions like this happen to her, she says she doesn’t know how to respond, so “of course I’m just going to start staring at you.”
@thisisjenae ♬ original sound - jenae
What is the Gen Z stare?
While it’s unclear exactly where the phrase stemmed from, the idea of the Gen Z stare likely originated on TikTok. It relates to the unfocused eyes and blank expression often given by those working in retail, the seeing-straight-through-you stare.
And creator @rockymtnvalerie was one of the first to post about it, detailing her experience of working a customer service job. In the video, she takes on the blank face of the Gen Z stare while interacting with a customer ordering a coffee. The painful conversation, she says, “may be the result of Boomer lead head.”
And the comments section is going wild. “Millennials finally got something to say about Gen Z and I think they ran with it and Gen Z was not happy,” Valerie said in an interview with The New York Times.
@rockymtnvalerie Gen Z stare may be the result of boomer lead head. #genz #genzstare #fyp
♬ original sound -
Why are Gen Z and millennials arguing?
Valerie’s video was one of dozens of clips racking up many views on TikTok, with debate opening up about what the Gen Z stare is, and when the generation is using it.
In an explainer video, user @185dashuaige says, “Who’s going to tell Gen Z the stare we’re talking about is not the one that everyone under the age of 40 gives a boomer. We’re talking about the stare when anyone tries to have just a normal human interaction with you, like in the flesh, and you guys freeze the fuck up.”
She adds that she’s experienced the stare when interacting with teens on the street, they look at you “like they’ve seen a ghost” when all you have said is “hi.”
The user goes on to explain it as a “blank, deer in the headlights stare,” the “lights are on and no one’s home look” that Gen Z give, adding that she’s not sure “if the pandemic messed you guys up or if it’s the iPads.”
Millenials don’t understand the Gen Z stare
Underneath @185dashuaige’s video, millennials are commenting that “Covid destroyed [Gen Z’s] opportunities to have normal relationships.” Others are saying, “Let’s be real… they have ZERO interest in interacting.”
Other millennials are taking to the app to talk about their interactions with the younger generation. One user who received the Gen Z stare recently said she “walked away from the interaction so confused.”
@rileysomsendespot I received the Gen Z Stare the other day. I walked away from the interaction so confused. I am against slamming a generation as a whole, because I know this isn't all of Gen Z. The interaction was just weird, you know? #genzstare #fyp #millennial
♬ original sound - Riley Despot💕✨️|SAHM|
People are blaming the pandemic and a lack of social skills
While the debate over what the Gen Z stare actually is battles on, the reason for its being is also under the microscope. Whether it was the pandemic or iPads, or a lack of social skills, people aren’t sure. But Gen Z are coming out to defend themselves.
@camera_broccoli writes in a series of posts on X: “As an early Gen Zer, I haven’t noticed the ‘stare’ so much in early Gen Z but late Gen Z for sure (~2007 onward), not sure why. In fact, a lot of people around my age complain about how younger people are lacking empathy and social skills almost entirely.”
“If I had to guess, it’s probably a mix of Covid hitting right when they became teenagers and the dominance of the internet in almost all aspects of life. They were pretty much chronically online the second they were old enough to use a computer.”
as an early gen z’er i havent noticed the “stare” so much in early gen z but late gen z for sure (~2007 onward), not sure why. in fact a lot of people around my age complain about how younger people are lacking empathy and social skills almost entirely
— Broccoli (@camera_broccoli) July 13, 2025
X user @maoisthnvx_25 agrees: “Gen Z/Alpha doesn’t ‘lack social skills,’ we just have different social norms. The discourse surrounding the ‘Gen Z stare’ and other perceived social slights is the millennial version of boomers complaining about millennials saying ‘no problem’ instead of ‘you’re welcome.’”
gen z/alpha doesn’t “lack social skills” we just have different social norms. the discourse surrounding the “gen z stare” and other perceived social slights is the millennial version of boomers complaining about millennials saying “no problem” instead of “you’re welcome”
— maowadi 📕 🪂🔻 (@maoisthnvx_25) July 14, 2025
Although X user @shakirazyx makes a valid point in asking: “Is it the ‘Gen Z stare’ or are customer service workers just exhausted, burned out, and silently enduring verbal abuse because speaking up could cost us our jobs so we just stare while Boomers and Gen X lose it?”
Is it the ‘Gen Z stare’ or are customer service workers just exhausted, burned out, and silently enduring verbal abuse because speaking up could cost us our jobs so we just stare while boomers and gen x lose it?
— shakira (@shakirazyx) July 12, 2025
Perhaps Gen Z workers just need a break from the relentless stream of ‘stupid’ questions from customers. Instead, we have a debate over what the Gen Z stare is, and millennials are completely missing the point of it. Maybe they’re still bitter they can’t shake the millennial pause…
