Gen Z women in their boysober phase are embracing the delights of audio porn
Remember when dating apps were carefree and fun? No? Well, me neither. Even on a good day, navigating dating apps feels like crossing a minefield—one wrong swipe and boom, you’ve matched with your ex’s best friend, a full-fledged psychopath, or someone who already ghosted you last year. For some heterosexual women out there, the experience has gotten so bad that they’ve decided to go ‘boysober.’ This means no romantic dates, hook-ups, sneaky links, or texting your ex out of pure boredom or morbid curiosity. But, let’s be clear, the girlies aren’t exactly going celibate. Quite the opposite, actually. They are focusing all their love, attention and sexual pleasure on themselves by tuning into the latest feminist trend in erotica: audio porn.
@justhopinalong The official boysober rules lmk if you had questions or feedback
♬ original sound - Hope
What is audio porn?
Audio porn, as you might have guessed, is just sexy stuff in audio format. It experienced a major boom during the COVID-19 pandemic when most of us were forced to give up intimacy with a partner due to the no-contact rule. So the people downloaded some smutty podcasts instead, plugged in their earphones, and lost themselves to their imagination as a slow, seductive voice walked them through a range of erotic scenarios.
@dipseastories its me, im girls 😇😇
♬ original sound - DIPSEA
Another reason why this type of porn has rapidly risen in popularity is that it is giving erotic material the much-needed feminist makeover we’ve all been waiting for. The traditional sex industry is notorious for its objectification and exploitation of women. Audio porn, however, is overwhelmingly ethically and consensually produced.
There is no need to show bodies or faces, for instance, which better protects the privacy of performers, safeguarding them from societal stigma and personal harassment. Moreover, this safe approach to porn doesn’t require any real physical interaction, significantly reducing the risk of coercion and abuse.
Audio porn is also incredibly kink-positive, with BDSM, role-play, public sex, and anal intercourse being some of its many options. This art form—yes, it’s an art form—also has limitless storyline options available since all that’s required for production is sound…
@dipseastories Do the greek gods have rizz?? Hades does 😏 #poeticrizz #hadesandpersephone #greekgods
♬ night vibe - skyfall beats
But enough with the pitch and sell. Let’s hear from one of the most important voices in the audio porn industry, Hannah Albertshauser, Chief Executive at Bloom Stories, a publisher of intimate audio stories that help people nourish their desires.
“For too long, pornography was made to cater solely to the desires of men and the male gaze,” Albertshauser began when I asked her how audio porn explores women’s bodies and sexualities in a way that traditional porn doesn’t.
“In traditional, visual porn you’ll often see unrealistic portrayals of sex, and it’s easy to feel like a bystander. Audio porn is different because it puts the listener at the centre of the story and lets you use your imagination. The format allows women to enjoy erotic material, without the idealised representations of women and their bodies often presented in visual porn. Audio erotica also tends to be narrative and character-led, which strikes a completely different tone,” Albertshauser explained.
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Research suggests that mainstream pornography, just like social media, fuels negative body images and eating disorder symptoms in young people. In fact, when period care company Callaly launched its We Need to Talk About Vulvas campaign, it uncovered that one in five people aged 16 to 24 have considered cutting or bleaching their vulva, mainly because their private parts don’t measure up to the perfect, surgically enhanced ones represented in mainstream pornography. Indeed, the internet tends to be the place where most young people see vulvas that aren’t their own for the first time.
According to the International Journal of Impotence Research, labiaplasties (surgery to reduce the size of the labia minora) became the 15th most popular plastic surgery procedure in the US in 2019, with overexposure to social media and pornography being cited as some of the many reasons. Doctors have claimed that girls as young as 11 years have met with them to have their genitals look “like a Barbie.”
So imagine how much better things would be if we removed the obsession with someone else’s body from sex. How great would it be if our body and sexuality were at the centre of the experience rather than watching someone else succumb to a (probably faked) orgasm? The only thing better I can imagine is to take this newfound sexual knowledge into the dating world and find a partner who appreciates us, our bodies, and our desires in the same way we’ve just learned to appreciate them.
@dipseastories 🎧📖: The Highlander on Dipsea #bookboyfriend #fictionalmen #romancebooktok
♬ original sound - DIPSEA
“For young women who are looking to focus more on their sexual relationship with themselves than with others, audio erotica can be an empowering way to experiment, find out what [they] like and explore [their] sexuality in a fun and safe way. 60 per cent of our listeners are female,” the Bloom Stories CEO said. “With our content, we aim to empower women to express their desires fully, experiment and have their fantasies fulfilled through erotica that’s not only realistic and consent-led but deeply sexy and kinky. It’s important to remember that it is entirely possible to create erotic content that does both,” she continued.
Albertshauser stressed: “All our voice actors record from the comfort and safety of their own studios so they’re never under pressure to perform a scene in a particular way. And they are always free to opt out of a scene or story they’re not comfortable with. We always fairly compensate our creatives for their work and we’re incredibly proud of the talent on our team.”
It is certainly interesting how a moment of frustration with men and the general dating climate is inspiring young women to start a journey of sexual exploration and rediscover a medium that has historically overly sexualised and mistreated them, rather than respecting their desires.
Boy sobriety has thus gotten an unexpectedly sexy and innovative twist. Leave it to the girlies to start a revolution.
“Adopting a boysober lifestyle doesn’t mean sacrificing sexual pleasure or neglecting your sexual needs,” Cindy Lim, Head of Brand and Marketing for Yuzu, Match Group’s new social and dating app for the Asian community, clarified in an interview with SCREENSHOT. “Instead, it encourages young people to find fulfilment and understanding in these areas in ways that don’t rely on romantic or sexual relationships.”
“Boysober is more about taking a conscious break from romantic relationships and the pursuit of male validation. It’s not just about avoiding sex; it’s about creating space for self-reflection, personal growth, and breaking free from toxic dating habits.”
Here’s to that!
