A few days ago, I had absolutely no idea what a Prince Albert piercing was. In all honesty, I didn’t even know it was a thing until I saw the term show up in the highly researched terms on Google. Because of its strange name, I had to look it up, skip article previews and click straight on images. Well, I wasn’t disappointed to say the least… What is a Prince Albert piercing? Why is it called a Prince Albert piercing in the first place? Here’s everything you need to know about the term.

A Prince Albert is a piercing placed on the penis, in which a metal ring is pierced through the skin at the tip of the penis. The ring begins almost straight to pierce through the penis, and is then bent with pliers to create a rounded ring shape. Some people like to attach little charms to their Prince Albert ring.

View this post on Instagram

Come in and view my extensive body piercing portfolio and have a free consultation about what you want next #art #pierced #piercedguys #piercednipples #piercedwomen #penis #princealbertpiercing #princealbert #earpiercing #dandukepiercer #danduke #az #nau #ccc #woodys #aztattoos #azpiercings #azmodels #sedona #williams #winslow #route66

A post shared by Dan Duke Body Piercer (@dan_duke_piercer) on May 18, 2017 at 12:50am PDT

The piercing enters the penis at the frenulum and exits at the urethra, going through the urethral meatus. If you’re wondering how painful it is, it supposedly is very painful, as expected. If you’re looking to get one done on yourself, please remember that this procedure should only be carried out by a professional with a lot of experience in genital piercing—duh.

It typically takes weeks to heal, just like any other piercings, and there’s quite a bit of bleeding. Little tip here, try avoiding excessive drinking when getting a piercing as alcohol is a vasodilator, meaning it will allow more blood to flow, and you don’t want that.

If you’re truly looking for a ‘too much information’ moment, yes, with a Prince Albert piercing you do pee out of both holes. Get used to the idea if you’re about to get one. Variations on the Prince Albert include the reverse Prince Albert, which goes around the top of the penis tip rather than underneath, and the Prince’s wand, which involves a t-shaped piercing.

If you’re still unsure of what exactly a Prince Albert piercing looks like, just do what I did and go on Google Images—you’ll find everything you’re looking for.

The name Albert has a long history in the British royal family. It was King George VI’s first name as well as Queen Victoria’s husband, Prince Albert, who was Harry’s great, great, great, great grandfather. In 2018, just before Prince Harry and Meghan Markle welcomed their first baby into the world, Albert had been announced as one of the preferred names for the baby, along with Alexander, James and Arthur.

The name Albert was also originally predicted to be Prince William and Kate’s choice when Prince Louis was born in 2017. In other words, it seems as if none of the royals had any idea about the other use for the term.

The rumours say that Prince Albert (remember the husband of Queen Victoria herself) had a penis piercing in his twenties. Of course, this hasn’t been confirmed but the rumours were strong enough to get the piercing named after him.

Some people even believe that the piercing helped the Prince’s penis to hang in an ‘aesthetically pleasing fashion’ in trousers, while others suggest that he had Peyronie’s disease and had the piercing in an attempt to straighten his penis.

I highly doubt those stories are true but if Prince Albert did have a penis piercing, good for him but he certainly wasn’t the first one. The Kama Sutra, which was written long before Prince Albert was born, mentions genital piercing as a way to obtain true sexual pleasure. This brings me to my next point and answer to a question that must now be on your mind.

According to Healthline, glans or shaft piercings like the Prince Albert “move around and graze penile tissue when you masturbate or during oral, anal, or genital sex. This can stimulate more nerves and make you feel more pleasure.” Furthermore, the Prince Albert wand can be used for sounding (having your partner put jewellery in their mouth and hum), which “vibrates your entire penis and can feel intensely pleasurable.”

When it comes to your partner’s pleasure, having a Prince Albert piercing can also stimulate more of your partner’s vaginal or anal nerves during sex. “The reverse Prince Albert is more suited to stimulate the clitoris and increase your partner’s pleasure,” explains Healthline.

First things first, let me start by explaining the term ‘basic bitch’ (where both words can also be capitalised for a more dramatic effect). Depending on the country she (being a basic bitch has nothing to do with gender, but for the sake of this article I’ll be describing a female basic bitch) comes from, the basic bitch can display a few different characteristics. However, she will always have some main universal traits.

At the top of the list is her sense of fashion. Many will recognise a basic bitch by the camel UGG boots she’s wearing and the generic Michael Kors bag she’ll always have by her side. Take the French version of the basic bitch and she will still be wearing UGG boots, this time in black, and will have replaced her Michael Kors bag with a Zadig & Voltaire one or the Balenciaga Classic City bag—you can take my word for it, as I’ve been there, done that.

Usually a big fan of any Starbucks drinks, the basic bitch will definitely be drinking a Pumpkin Spice Latte during autumn. When the weather gets warmer, she might switch to a frappuccino with extra whipped cream. Mainly inspired by shows such as Gossip Girl, The Hills and 90210, the basic bitch loves a bit of rose gold jewellery and a good pair of leggings.

But more importantly, being a true basic bitch is not only limited to the way you dress—because, as I’ve said before, this can depend on the country, the city and even the neighbourhood the basic bitch comes from. Being a basic bitch has now become an identity, a state of mind and, sometimes, an insult. But why ‘basic’ and not any other term?

‘Basic’ as the pejorative term we know it to be today was originally used to describe someone or something unsophisticated; simple. But with the basic bitch, the term became the perfect adjective to describe (and ridicule) predominantly white women who all look and act the same. In other words, the basic bitch is so mainstream.

According to Google Trends, the term ‘basic bitch’ reached peak popularity in April 2014, shortly after the satirical video titled How To Tell if You’re a Basic Bitch was released by College Humor.

While being a basic bitch was almost a natural step in the life of a cisgender white female in 2014, many have speculated that the basic bitch no longer exists in 2020. But the basic bitch didn’t disappear; her style, like everybody else’s, merely evolved—she traded her Abercrombie & Fitch hoodie and her Lululemon leggings for that dress from Zara, a pair of Birkenstock sandals and a Fjällräven Kånken backpack.

Do I regret my own basic bitch years? Yes and no. In my case, I like to think that peer pressure and the immeasurable desire to fit in that most teenagers go through were the two factors behind my short-lived basic bitch phase. And although Facebook reminders come to haunt me with pictures of my 14-year-old self wearing atrocious fluorescent yellow joggers that spelled out PINK or SEXY on my bum, I keep telling myself that at the same time, I was also beginning to discover my own sense of style by hunting down a vintage pair of Vivienne Westwood Roman-inspired shoes.

Would I call anyone a basic bitch out loud in 2020? Probably not. Would I think it or text it to a friend? Most definitely. But what doesn’t fall under the ‘basic’ umbrella nowadays anyway? With the rise of social media platforms such as Instagram and TikTok, even the smallest subcultures have become somewhat ‘basic’.

So you think you’re being super edgy because you have pink hair? Think again. Does owning a pair of the Sunday Service tracksuits makes you different? You’re just a rich basic bitch. And that is absolutely fine.

We need to accept the fact that we’re bound to be predictable and mainstream sometimes. Accepting this is the first step towards being kinder to yourself. Just say it with me: we’re all basic bitches.