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until the 2024 United States presidential election
Joe Biden
Marianne Williamson
Dean Phillips
Cenk Uygur
Donald Trump
Ron DeSantis
Nikki Haley
Vivek Ramaswamy
Asa Hutchinson
Ryan Binkley
Chris Christie
Doug Burgum
Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
Cornel West
Jill Stein
Your weekly debrief on the 2024 US presidential elections. Stay in the loop with our bite-sized, crystal-clear summaries of the week’s political rollercoaster. From speeches to polls, we’ve got you covered. Get the lowdown, sans the jargon. It’s democracy demystified, served fresh once a week.
This week, we’re explaining incumbent Joe Biden’s gen Z voter woes and perpetual troublemaker Donald Trump’s latest legal attack.
Your inviable guide to the 2024 US presidential candidates. We've compiled all the essential details about the Republicans, Democrats, and Independents currently battling it out for the presidency. From their key policies and campaign promises to their star signs and memorable statements you can use to get a feel for their vibe—we’ve got it all covered.
Joe Biden
Name: Joe Biden
Political party: Democrat
State they’re from: Pennsylvania
Notable policies: A modest gun safety bill expanding background checks, an extensive student loan forgiveness package, and the introduction of the Build Back Better plan—a legislation framework that, if successful, would be the most comprehensive public investment scheme of all time. Biden hasn’t had a massively successful first presidential term, but he managed to issue 121 executive orders—all of which primarily worked towards undoing the work done by his predecessor, Donald Trump.
Key campaign promises: ‘Bidenomics’ (whatever that means, but Biden himself is obsessed with it), the protection of democracy, and restoring America’s global standing—so ultimately, a whole load of waffle. While Biden might try and appear to come across as a politician focused on protecting the rights of LGBTQIA+ individuals and minority communities, he’s failed so far to fight against the rising hate and extreme religious conservatism spreading across the nation. This is an issue he’s trying to combat during the current election cycle.
Star sign: Scorpio. This makes sense because of the fact that Biden is both highly emotional and I’ve heard that Scorpios are known for falling over a lot.
Polling position: It’s giving retirement vibes?
Wildest thing they’ve said: In 2020, during a radio show interview, Biden said this: “If you have a problem figuring out whether you’re for me or Trump, then you ain’t Black.” Yup... You really can’t make this stuff up.
Marianne Williamson
Name: Marianne Williamson
Political party: Democrat
State they’re from: Texas
Notable policies: The political activist and author who was previously a candidate for the 2020 Democratic Party presidential nomination is back to try her luck again in the 2024 US election. While she has never held an official office, one of her most notable proposed policies is the creation of two government departments: the first being a Department of Peace, which would focus on promoting peace, diplomacy, and conflict resolution both domestically and internationally. Williamson has also proposed the creation of a Department of Children and Youth, with the aim of addressing the challenges and issues faced by these age groups. She has been a vocal critic of what she perceives as neglect by the US government, particularly regarding children’s well-being and education. During her time as a political candidate, Williamson has also emphasised the importance of love, compassion, and holistic well-being in political discourse. In short, the author has presented herself as a new hero for many gen Zers who’ve never really felt represented before.
Key campaign promises: Williamson is also well known for being an advocate for the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA), a proposed constitutional amendment aimed at guaranteeing equal legal rights regardless of gender. Williamson has also expressed support for the rights of individuals who identify as LGBTQIA+, expressed support for a Medicare for All healthcare system (a proposal for a single-payer healthcare system that would provide universal healthcare coverage to all Americans), advocated for a $100 billion plan for reparations to the descendants of enslaved people, and also been a supporter of the Green New Deal, a proposed policy framework aimed at addressing climate change, promoting renewable energy, and addressing environmental issues while creating jobs and economic opportunities.
Star sign: Cancer, so she gives off serious empathetic energy. On an ego scale, she might score around 4, mainly because all authors have a bit of an ego, but overall, she’s a good vibe.
Polling position: Despite her popularity among young voters and on platforms like TikTok, Williamson faced an uphill battle during the 2020 presidential campaign and did not emerge as a viable contender for victory. Moreover, Williamson’s poll numbers for the 2024 election are still pretty low, suggesting that the candidate will have a relatively small chance to win...
Wildest thing they’ve said: In the midst of her 2020 campaign trail, she once declared: “If you think any of this wonkiness is going to deal with this dark psychic force of the collectivised hatred that this president is bringing up in this country, then I’m afraid that the Democrats are going to see some very dark days.” Pretty deep stuff.
Dean Phillips
Name: Dean Phillips
Political party: Democrat
State they’re from: Minnesota
Notable policies: Minnesota Representative Phillips formally launched his presidential campaign end of October 2023 and filed to run in New Hampshire’s Democratic primary, kicking off his long-shot challenge to President Joe Biden. In Congress, the moderate Democrat diverged from more progressive Democrats on issues such as law enforcement funding and stationing armed police in schools. Phillips, who is Jewish, has also been highly critical of fellow Rep. Ilhan Omar’s past comments on Israel. Phillips encouraged Americans to support the people of Israel while remaining empathetic to “the plight of the Palestinians.”
Key campaign promises: In his opening remarks during his candidacy announcement, Phillips talked about many of the issues he sees the US facing today and how he plans on solving them. He discussed the mounting financial challenges Americans have faced over the last few years, noting, “Today’s America spends more paying our debts to the past than we are investing in our children’s future.” Phillips went on to say: “We fund more for fighting than we do for feeding. Corporations and the well-off, including me, enjoy more favourable tax treatment than hardworking American families.” Phillips also called out his concerns for gun safety, veteran homelessness, and mortality rates.
Star sign: Phillips is an Aquarius, a star sign known to be clever, analytical, technical, truthful, assertive, confident, progressive and innovative. Although, considering Phillips has basically spent his entire campaign gushing over President Biden, we think he gives off more of a Cancer vibe.
Polling position: Even though he doesn’t stand much of a chance of winning the Democratic nomination, Phillips poses a real danger to Biden’s 2024 reelection. Why? Because when he’s not complimenting Biden’s politics, he’s calling into question one of Biden’s biggest weaknesses: his old age. As a result, Phillips’ candidacy could further expose a major Biden vulnerability at a time when the US President is desperate to shore up his poll numbers in battleground states ahead of a likely general-election rematch with former President Donald Trump.
Wildest thing they’ve said: Announcing his candidacy on X (formerly Twitter), Phillips wrote “I promised my daughters when Trump won in 2016 that I’d stand up and do something about it, so I ran for Congress and am now on my third term. I didn’t set out to enter this race. But it looks like on our current course, the Democrats will lose and Trump will be our President again.”
Cenk Uygur
Name: Cenk Uygur
Political party: Democrat
State they’re from: Well, technically Uygur’s overseas birth in Istanbul renders him unqualified under the US Constitution, but that’s yet to stop him.
Notable policies: The founder and outspoken host of the progressive Young Turks TV show said he could win the Democratic nomination for president despite obstacles such as not actually being a “natural-born US citizen.” Uygur came to the US from Turkey at eight years old. Oh, and the political commentator and media host was also a candidate in two 2020 races for California’s 25th Congressional District: the regular election and the special election. Needless to say, he didn’t win.
Key campaign promises: Though he’s yet to clearly define his promises for this election, in the past, Uygur’s website mentioned: “Ending corruption in politics is one of the things that I am most passionate about. The way to do that is to keep pointing out that privately financed elections lead to politicians working for private interests.”
Star sign: Aries men, am I right?
Polling position: It’s hard to say—is Uygur even part of the race?
Wildest thing they’ve said: Announcing his extremely long-shot primary campaign to challenge the sitting president, Uygur stated: “I have lawyered up. I have the same lawyer [Bernie Sanders] used in both of his presidential runs [in 2016 and 2020, mounting strong progressive campaigns]. I’m going to the Supreme Court. Either I’m going to win or I’m going to lose. Now this case is on our side. The precedent is definitely on our side.” Yeah right babes, you keep telling yourself that...
Donald Trump
Name: Donald Trump
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: New York
Notable policies: For context, when it comes to Trump, ‘notable’ really translates to ‘bat shit crazy’. The first few that come to mind include his efforts to reverse climate change progress by initiating the US’ withdrawal from the 2015 Paris Agreement. Moreover, Trump employed a massive overhaul of the immigration system—tightening borders, reducing refugee admissions, and rolling out a highly racist rhetoric that targeted minorities and asylum seekers. Trump also restructured the tax system and shrunk the trade deficit with other countries. His efforts to try and restructure the entire Washington system definitely succeeded at times, particularly when it came to prioritising personal attacks and childish digs as opposed to facts and logic.
Key campaign promises: For his revival, Trump’s primary campaign promises have been centred around crime and punishment. The growing culture wars have given the former president a stage to further rile up conservatives and push for his own brand of anti-establishment far-right agenda. LGBTQIA+ issues are also a hot topic currently, and Trump has made banning gender-affirming care a top priority.
Star sign: Gemini. So basically, that means that Trump spends a lot of time looking at his orange hair in the mirror, lying. Oh, they’re also extremely impulsive—sound familiar?
Polling position: While it would be nice to think that Trump has a 0 per cent chance of winning the 2024 presidential elections, lots of people thought that back in 2016, and look at how that went. Realistically, the former president’s polling place will massively depend on whether or not competitor Ron DeSantis is able to pull together a strong voting base. DeSantis of course is currently the primary candidate for Republicans, but it’s true that Trump is heading up second place currently.
Wildest thing they’ve said: It’s almost impossible to pick Trump’s most Boomer-esque or controversial quote. However, we tried. This quote is in regard to his proposed immigration policies during the 2016 presidential campaign election cycle: “They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.”
Ron DeSantis
Name: Ron DeSantis
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: Florida
Notable policies: DeSantis’ list of notable policies is both extensive and depressing. So, we’ll try and keep it as succinct as possible. Firstly, the Florida Governor has been instrumental in reducing the rights of both the entire LGBTQIA+ community and the Black American community. In one instance, he introduced legislation that enabled medical professionals and for-profit insurers to deny patients care based on religious, moral or ethical reasons or beliefs. Then, he banned African-American studies at schools, stating that the courses pushed “an agenda.” Oh, and he also enforced a six-week abortion ban.
Key campaign promises: Given his track record, DeSantis’ campaign promises are equally as yucky. The Governor has big plans to completely gut the federal government, as well as declaring a state of emergency regarding immigration on his first day of office. Undoubtedly, there would also be a further reduction of both the rights and visibility of queer individuals.
Star sign: DeSantis is a male Virgo—what that really translates to is: stubborn, uptight, and overly critical.
Polling position: DeSantis definitely has a shot at the Republican nomination. Despite having dipped a bit in popularity, there’s no doubt that the Governor has a better shot than former President Donald Trump, who is currently facing a mountain of court cases.
Wildest thing they’ve said: Basically everything that comes out of his mouth is wild, but I think this has to be one of the wildest: “Very rarely do firearms restrictions affect criminals. They really only affect law-abiding citizens.” To be fair, we should just give up then...
Nikki Haley
Name: Nikki Haley
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: South Carolina
Notable policies: When Haley served as the 116th Governor of South Carolina from 2011 to 2017, she focused on economic development, education reform, and disaster preparedness. She’s also made her support of Israel very clear in the past.
Key campaign promises: In early May 2023 at a campaign event in Iowa, Haley promised to veto any spending bill that raised federal spending above pre-pandemic levels. She also criticised Biden and congressional Republicans and Democrats for excessive government spending and dubious earmarking.
Star sign: Haley is a Capricorn, which means that her spiritual animal is the goat—not sure if she’s the greatest of all time though.
Polling position: While Haley is a well-known Republican figure and has a strong following within the party, her polling position for the 2024 presidential election is uncertain. She faces competition from other prominent Republicans, and her standing may fluctuate as the election season progresses.
Wildest thing they’ve said: In 2012, while on The Colbert Report, Haley spoke about the tough political climate of South Carolina and stated: “It’s a blood sport. I wear heels and it’s not for a fashion statement, it’s ammunition.”
Vivek Ramaswamy
Name: Vivek Ramaswamy
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: Ohio
Notable policies: A newcomer to the messy world of politics, Ramaswamy is extremely anti-woke. He’s spent a lot of time creating videos and media all targeted towards supposedly ‘embarrassing’ or ‘shutting down’ the leftist woke agenda.
Key campaign promises: Ramaswamy has promised to abolish the FBI, the Department of Education, and the Nuclear Regulatory Commission, deeming them fundamentally “redundant.” Moreover, Ramaswamy has promised to completely erase “race-based affirmative action,” up the voting age from 18 to 25, and forge national unity by completely breaking away from Communist China. Who knows what he’s on about...
Star sign: Ramaswamy is a Leo. Considering the fact that he moonlighted as a rapper during college and has stated that ‘Lose Yourself’ by Eminem is his life’s theme song, I don’t think anyone’s really surprised.
Wildest thing they’ve said: In the books Ramaswamy has published, he compared the “woke left” to “psychological slavery,” claiming that like a “new secular religion” it “says your gender, race and sexual orientation determines who you are and what you can achieve in life.”
Asa Hutchinson
Name: Asa Hutchinson
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: Arkansas
Notable policies: Hutchinson is your stereotypical Republican conservative. During his tenure as Governor of Arkansas, he has proposed completely barring Syrian refugees from entering the state, resumed executions, introduced a flat-out ban on abortions, and has single-handedly ensured that the state remains an unsafe place for members of the LGBTQIA+ community.
Key campaign promises: Hutchinson has pitched himself to Republicans as the ‘anti-Trump’—a strong and unwavering leader who isn’t out for revenge. He’s deeply religious and so has based a lot of his campaign on securing the Bible Belt voting bloc. Hutchinson is also keen to cut taxes and reduce state government. Undoubtedly, if made president, Hutchinson would also further extend a blanket ban on all abortions across the US.
Star sign: Hutchinson is a Sagittarius, which doesn’t really make any sense, because Sag men are supposed to be wise beyond their years, and Hutchinson’s thoughts about abortion are hella archaic.
Polling position: It’s not looking great for Hutchinson. Despite the general voter decline for Donald Trump and Ron DeSantis, it’s still unlikely that Hutchinson will be able to climb too far up the polls.
Wildest thing they’ve said: I don’t know if this is particularly wild so much as it is cringe: “My life has never been a part of a big plan. It’s more of an unfolding adventure.”
Ryan Binkley
Name: Ryan Binkley
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: Georgia
Notable policies: Though he was born in Georgia, Binkley settled in Texas soon after. The pastor of a megachurch and entrepreneur started his political career from scratch, and joined the presidential race with millions of his own dollars to invest in his campaign. A true man of God, Binkley says the mission of his campaign is to unite the country with the love of the big man. Good luck with that.
Key campaign promises: Binkley’s main campaign promises state that he plans on “securing the border, fix the immigration system, and provide immigrants the chance to be productive contributors to our economy.” In other words, he has focused his campaign on reducing the national debt by lowering federal spending, reducing healthcare costs, addressing immigration by increasing border security and streamlining the process of legal immigration, and increasing community involvement in education.
Star sign: Binkley’s a Scorpio, and you know what they say, sex is religion to the Scorpio male. I’m not sure Mrs Binkley would agree.
Polling position: #JustPrayForBinkley
Wildest thing they’ve said: The website for Create Church, which Binkley founded alongside his wife, states that marriage is a “sacred bond between one man and one woman,” which tells you everything you need to know about his views on LGBTQIA+ rights...
Chris Christie
Name: Chris Christie
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: New Jersey
Notable policies: As governor of New Jersey, Christie drew accolades for his management of his state’s recovery from Hurricane Sandy and condemnation for a scandal surrounding the closing of lanes onto the George Washington Bridge. It should also be noted that Christie is running for president for a second time after a disappointing campaign in 2016. Interestingly however, his views on Ukraine, on abortion and on other issues put him out of step with many in the party he hopes to lead.
Key campaign promises: Christie has centred his campaign around criticism of former President Trump. Speaking of Trump during an interview with Fox News, Christie said: “He’s a failed leader. We gave him a Republican House, a Republican Senate, and he failed [...] he failed us by losing the House, by losing the Senate, and by turning over the White House to Joe Biden. But apart from his obsession with going after Trump, the Republican candidate is not promising much else.
Star sign: It’s believed that Virgo men have very strong intuitive skills and thus can find deceitful people easily. Christie’s clearly got a thing against Trump. Coincidence? I think not.
Polling position: Christie’s basically running as the anti-Trump. Unfortunately for him, that means that Republican supporters don’t even see him as an option.
Wildest thing they’ve said: Honestly? There isn’t much to report on here, just some more Trump-related slander, and we’re here for it.
Doug Burgum
Name: Doug Burgum
Political party: Republican
State they’re from: North Dakota
Notable policies: Burgum has had a pretty varied political background. One of his most notable—and very un-Republican—policies has been his proposal to have North Dakota carbon-neutral by 2030. The Governor still actively pursued a robust fossil fuel industry though... Burgum is strongly for tax cuts and considers himself to be a high-key impressive businessman. That, of course, is up for debate.
Key campaign promises: Burgum, while largely unknown on the national level, is playing a rather strategic conservative presidential game by focusing on economic goals rather than cultural politics and ideology. Focusing on his entrepreneurial pursuits, Burgum has worked up a very tight voter base back in North Dakota, so it’ll be interesting to see how that translates to points.
Star sign: Leo. While I don’t think that Burgum gives off mega Leo energy, North Dakota is right next to Mount Rushmore which is kind of big d*ck energy, so...
Polling position: As previously mentioned, Burgum is a pretty minor league player in the upcoming elections. However, similarly to Hutchinson, with Trump and DeSantis struggling to hold onto the right-wing base, anyone’s got a shot at the big desk.
Wildest thing they’ve said: At the beginning of Burgum’s campaign, he stated: “You’re judged by the company you keep.” I personally think this is pretty telling given the amount of transphobes the Governor hangs out with.
Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
Name: Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
Political party: Though he initially ran for the Democratic nomination, in October 2023, the candidate announced that he would run as an independent instead.
State they’re from: Washington
Notable policies: After starting his career as an assistant district attorney in New York City, RFK Jr. pretty quickly focused on environmental protection. But things took a turn for the worse when he became obsessed with advocating anti-vaccine misinformation and public health-related conspiracy theories. Since the beginning of the pandemic, Kennedy has emerged as a leading proponent of COVID-19 vaccine misinformation in the US.
Key campaign promises: On his campaign website, Kennedy lays out his six “priorities,” which include rebuilding public institutions, restoring civil liberties, reversing the country’s economic decline, ending foreign wars, healing political and racial divides, and cleaning up the environment. Don’t ask us how promoting anti-vaccine propaganda is going to help with any of these.
Star sign: Capricorn: the sign’s symbol is a sea goat. Take of that what you will.
Polling position: Doesn’t matter how famous his family is, RFK Jr. has simply said too many absurd things to be taken seriously in the elections. The only thing we really want to know is if JFK is still alive.
Wildest thing they’ve said: In January 2022, at a rally against vaccine mandates in Washington DC, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. likened vaccine policies in the US to the actions of a totalitarian state, even suggesting Anne Frank was in a better situation when she was hiding from the Nazis. His statement, which, frankly, barely made any sense, led his famous family to issue public statements denouncing his comments.
Cornel West
Name: Cornel West
Political party: Started running with the People’s Party, then moved on to the Green Party, only to switch again to run as an independent.
State they’re from: Oklahoma
Notable policies: West is a prominent American philosopher and socialist whose topics of study have previously focused on race, gender, and class struggle. West frequently uses non-traditional philosophical mediums such as TV and music to get his message across and has also written 20 books. He is a staunch leftist and has previously voiced support for Bernie Sanders.
Key campaign promises: Key campaign promises: West’s key campaign promises revolve around fighting to end mass poverty, instate universal health care, guarantee housing, education, and living wages for everyone and prioritise saving the planet through the Green New Deal. This climate change prioritisation package is a comprehensive plan to get to 100 per cent clean, renewable energy by 2030 through utilising a carbon tax, a jobs guarantee, free college, single-payer healthcare, and a focus on public programmes.
Star sign: Gemini. I don’t know about you, but I think West might be one of the only left-leaning politicians who is a Gemini. All of the others seem to be delulu gun-toting Republicans!
Polling position: As much as I’d like to think that West has a good shot of taking this thing, he’s an outsider third-party candidate, which means he doesn’t hold nearly as much voting power as say DeSantis or Biden. That being said, it’s a sure thing that West will snatch some gen Zers’ votes and could even potentially throw a spanner in the works for our incumbent.
Wildest thing they’ve said: Now, while this quote isn’t particularly ‘wild’, it is kind of iconic that there’s someone running for President who actually speaks some sense. During one of his most famous philosophical speeches, West declared: “None of us alone can save the nation or the world. But each of us can make a positive difference if we commit ourselves to do so.”
Jill Stein
Name: Jill Stein
Political party: Green Party
State they’re from: Illinois, however, all of Stein’s political career is linked to Massachusetts.
Notable policies: Stein’s political ideology and activism all stem from her work as a physician. As a medical professional, the Chicago native has been a strong proponent of the connection between people’s health and the quality of their local environment. While Stein has been a prominent activist for some time, she’s never reached political office, having been defeated on numerous occasions in her bid for governor and state representative. While she has had some local success, her sights have always been set on a much bigger stage. Stein has run for the presidential nomination twice before.
Key campaign promises: As a presidential candidate, Stein has focused her campaign promises on promoting an anti-war stance, wholly supporting the Green New Deal (a comprehensive plan to attempt to combat climate change and reverse unemployment and poverty) and pushing for universal healthcare. Stein has also been vocal about her would-be plans to address the humanitarian crisis in Palestine. While a number of Stein’s policies and campaign promises align with the Democrats, the politician left the Democratic party after she alleged that they “killed campaign finance reform” in her state.
Star sign: Stein is a Taurus. This particular sign is known for its stubbornness, a trait that clearly reflects why Stein refuses to give up on the idea that the US might one day be a three-party system.
Polling position: While people might be quick to underestimate Stein, it’s important to remember that the few votes she stole from Hilary Clinton back in 2016 potentially led to Donald Trump’s victory. Therefore, there is a chance that her small sway could do the same to the incumbent, Joe Biden.
Wildest thing they’ve said: In 2016, during her last presidential campaign, Stein declared that “we should not be subjecting kids’ brains” to Wi-Fi. This is more so wild because imagine trying to take a 12-year-old’s iPad away from them—scary stuff.
Your backstage pass to the 2024 US presidential elections. From breaking news to quirky campaign tales, we’ve got the scoop on all the political circus you won’t want to miss.
