Hair clippers and a hairdryer were among items flagged in a BBC investigation on Wednesday 3 February. They are still available on Wish’s site and app. Other dangerous items included a scooter charger with an illegal clover-shaped plug, an extension lead that can cause electric shock, and a travel adaptor lacking safety shutters, leaving internal live components exposed.

But as dangerous as these items are, Wish has made a name for itself as one of the largest ecommerce marketplaces in the world not only for its products’ dodgy health and safety guidelines but also because users can literally find anything they’re looking for on there. To prove just how wide Wish’s product range is, here are some of the weirdest items you can purchase on the app.

First one on the list is an interesting one to say the least—I’m unsure of who came up with the concept, but this peculiar oversized nose-shaped gel soap dispenser is probably what Salvador Dalí’s wildest dreams were made of. In other words, it’s a big no-no from me.

Sold on the website under the name ‘Funny Nose Shower Gel Soap Dispenser Interesting things’ and for the price of £7 (only? That’s a bargain if you ask me), this item dispenses shower gel out of its right nostril, making it look like—you guessed it—nose boogers.

This little plastic ball filled with, yes, nothing but void is, according to its packaging, the “ultimate in minimalism.” Probably bought as a joke by pranksters who’ve heard their friends say they ‘already have everything they need’ too many times, this £2 present is not only weird and not that funny, but also wasteful for no good reason. No, thanks.

Okay, first of all, who even is a fan of Nicolas Cage anymore? Are any of them still out there? Secondly, what’s up with Wish and its obsession with the man? From this creepy reversible sequin pillowcase to full tracksuits with his face printed all over, you can find way too much Cage merchandise on this app for my taste. Again, no, thanks.

Wish has a pretty strange t-shirt for sale, one that depicts the iconic under-the-rain embrace from The Notebook, only this one has the faces of Trump and Kim Jong-un photoshopped on it. This one hits the mark for being spot on when it comes to summing up 2020. Wouldn’t spend £8 for this piece of crap though.

Okay, this little enamel pin made to look exactly like your usual MacDonald’s box of 6 chicken nuggets is slightly strange, but it’s a yes from me! I can easily imagine TikTok’s trendiest kids wearing these on the lapel of the leather perfecto in no time. For £2, why not?

Simply scrolling past this gem made me gag a little. For £3, the ‘Nail Ingrown Toenail Care Tool Professional Fixer Recover Correction Device Protector Tool Pedicure Foot Acronyx Onyxis’ guarantees potential buyers that it will fix their own ingrown toenail worries. How? I would explain but I truly worry I will get sick while doing so… See for yourself in the lovely picture above.

As you might notice, only one person on Wish decided to purchase this monstrosity, and yet, they gave it 5 stars! Would you look at that…

Remember those furry pom poms everyone had at one point attached either to their bag’s handle or showcased on top of their beanie? The ones made of real fur came from Charlotte Simone while the cheaper looking ones were sold in every colour imaginable in Topshop. Ah, those were the days!

Here’s Wish take on those: some spine-chilling, half baby, half pom pom looking accessories. And the babies themselves are wearing beanies adorned with a pom pom, Inception-style. If you’re looking to have a laugh, just go through the item’s reviews, you won’t be disappointed—people love them!

Look at those! Need I say more?

This pack of cards is made up of cards sized 20 by 28 centimetres. Don’t ask why, but reviews are praising their purchase as a “super fun party trick.” How lame, honestly.

Let’s be honest, had I been high and scrolling through Wish’s weirdest items, I would have probably spent the £4 required for this mini saxophone smoking pipe. Does it really work? Most definitely not! Bonus: it comes with a set of filter screens. I’m obsessed!