How often did the eggplant emoji make you absolutely cringe when swiping through Tinder? A recent study conducted by researchers at the Kinsey Institute found that a frequent use of emojis is directly linked to having sex more frequently. Yes, you read that correctly—your sex life now depends on emojis.
And it is not just your sex life; in fact, emojis have been proven to be effective signals for relationship-oriented digital communication, leading to a more successful dating life. The researchers have conducted two separate surveys. In the first, they found that 28 percent of Americans use emojis regularly, 3 percent use one in every text, 2.5 percent use more than one in every text, and all participants found that using emojis provided them with a better outlet for self expression than text-based messages.
The second survey found that 97 percent of its partakers use emojis when speaking to potential love interests and showed that emoji use is related to maintaining connections with a first date, meaning that people would be more likely to engage in intimate behaviours as time progresses. Both surveys were then connected to information such as how often do these people have sex, go on a second date, and kiss their partner, and it appeared that those who participated in these activities the most also happened to send the most emojis.
This probably shouldn’t come as a surprise—emojis, in a way, are a 21st century art form in itself. There is even an animated film dedicated to them titled, perhaps unsurprisingly, The Emoji Movie, and a few years ago a university in Ireland shared potential plans of creating an emoji as a foreign language course. Somehow, emoticons have gained immense pop-cultural value, and it was only a matter of time until they caught up with the way we communicate among each other.
There are limitations to the study, however, as there is no evidence of what type of emojis are used most frequently and which emojis link to what outcome. It is also important to note that the survey focused on the sending out of emojis rather than receiving, therefore there is no proof of how the latter reacts. While we question the likelihood of each emoji’s ability to turn us on, it is important to take the entire research with a grain of salt. But what does this say about our use and understanding of emojis?
It is no secret that when conversing via text certain elements of human communication get lost. Verbal communication and its meaning are greatly affected by the person’s voice, tone, and intonation, which simply can not be present in a text. Emojis can add that tone of voice into the conversation, allowing for a much more expressive and friendly flow, and essentially ease out the conversation.
Dating in today’s world is, without a doubt, stressful. Dating apps and websites have made dating a lot more accessible, as we now have the ability to plan our next hook-up with the tips of our fingers. However, the link between romance and technology has also created a handful of its own issues, such as the inability to find meaningful love or presenting us with too much choice, which results in confusion as well as anxieties over not appearing too desperate. Emojis are able to add a certain tone of casualty and laid-backness to the conversation.
The previous idea could then be traced back to the survey and success of emojis in conversing among potential romantic partners. Emojis can sometimes make the conversation more relaxed and less serious, which could lead to a follow-up date. Of course, the fact that we need emojis to communicate better is slightly concerning, but, then again, we are shifting towards a digital future, and it is only natural that each and every element of our lives will become impacted by this, for better or for worse.
Considering the countless debates around how technology and mass digitalisation have changed dating as we know it, making it even more difficult to connect romantically and intimately, the argument that emojis are now improving our sex lives certainly comes as a paradox. But hey, it seems to work. So go on and up your emoji game.
You’ve probably sexted before, possibly with your partner or with your most recent match. It can be a fun, stress-free experience for some, but for others who’ve never done it before, it can also be intimidating and beginners can miss out on the opportunity of becoming a master of dirty talk. That’s where Slutbot comes in.
Launched by the creators of Juicebox, a sex and relationship coaching app, Slutbot is a free service developed by sex educators and erotic fiction writers—sexting pros basically. At the moment, texting Slutbot is only free in the U.S. and Canada, while the rest of the world can sext with it for the cost of your standard messaging rates. If you feel like trying it, you can text ‘slutbot’ to (+1) 415-650-0395.
Slutbot starts by asking your age, gender, and the gender of the person you’d like to practise sexting with. The chatbot offers different types of pairings like female user to male bot, female user to female bot, male user to female bot and so on. After picking a pairing that suits your needs, you’ll have to choose between two types of sexting: one softer, called ‘slow & gentle’, and another called ‘hot & sexy’, which, much like its title, is more forward.
When I decided to try it, Slutbot was considerate enough to choose a safe word, in case things got too hot too soon—the bot picked ‘pineapple’ for some reason. The conversation started quite slowly, with sentences like, “I’ve been thinking about you today. Last night was really hot”, nothing too crazy considering I picked the ‘hot & sexy’ option. Slutbot quickly killed the mood by using texting abbreviations like ‘O.M.G.’ and the ‘100’ emoji three times in a row, making me wonder if I was texting a bot or a 15-year-old. The experience as a whole wasn’t that bad, and for a sexting beginner, the upsides that could come from a few conversations with Slutbot are clear, if you can ignore the over-the-top use of emojis and the absence of any sense of humour.
Talking to the New York Times, Founder and CEO of Juicebox Brianna Rader said, “People think sex and dating is supposed to be easy and innate, but it’s not. It’s absolutely a life skill just like all other life skills, but unfortunately we’re never formally taught these things.” A study conducted by McAfee in the U.S. showed that 49 percent of all smartphone users sext and of those, 70 percent are between 18 and 24 years old, so it only makes sense that someone came up with a sexting ‘starter pack’ to help onboard this new generation of sexters. Although Slutbot is exactly what it says on the tin—a slutty bot—it should be seen as a first step towards opening up new horizons for your sex life (that is, if you feel like you need a little push).
Slutbot tackles important issues, like consent and communicating desires, by always ending a text asking users if they’re enjoying this conversation or want to try something new. By practising your sexting skills with Slutbot without dreading the possibility of being ghosted, you could eventually feel confident enough to try it out with someone real. Ghosting is a problem that goes hand-in-hand with technology, especially texting—not only with sexting. That’s where another app called Mei comes in, your best chance at texting perfectly, thus avoiding any chance of being ghosted. Once you’ve downloaded Mei, the app includes an AI assistant that gives you real-time comments on your texting skills as you chat with friends, family, and partners.
Let’s say you’ve been talking with your new crush for a few days, but you feel like the conversation is not going as smoothly anymore. In your text conversation, Mei will pop up at the top left corner to comment on your way of texting, advising you on which tone you should try out and why. The app’s website says, “We hope to be a new messaging option that users can be excited about”. Although the concept sounds great on paper (we all ask someone close for texting advice from time to time) the idea that people could one day rely on extra help to text from AI should be a forewarning of how our society is beginning to lean perhaps too heavily on technology (especially when it comes to social interactions).
By now we all know that technological innovations have both positive and negative impacts on our social interactions. So next time you feel like sexting for the first time, or you don’t want to receive an unsolicited dick pic, you’ll know Slutbot is always here for you. Same goes with texting your mum after having a bad argument with her, Mei will be there to help you formulate that perfect text. Let’s just try to avoid being dependent on these apps—preferably without throwing away our phones.