Taking nude selfies is an underestimated art that is highly complicated. Not to say that a few DIY nudes are not hot but when done correctly, nudes are no less than a piece of art—one that you can share during your sexting session or cherish forever as a major ego boost. Whichever you pick, there still remains one obstacle: you need a few tips on how to achieve the perfect balance. From your selfie’s lighting to your camera angle, every little detail counts! Here is how you can take better nudes.
Okay, let’s get into it. Taking a good naked picture is certainly harder than it looks—I can personally attest to that. While professionals like Instagram influencers, sex workers, and models can sometimes make it look oh-so-easy, any casual nude-taker can struggle to find the perfect shot.
Don’t worry about standing in front of your mirror for hours anymore. The key to a good thirst trap is in two things: experience, because no one can achieve perfection without experimenting a bit, and equipment, because a basic light ring can truly do wonders! So, let’s get started, shall we?
This may sound pretty obvious but picking a good camera angle when taking nude selfies is very important. First of all, you’re probably using your messed up phone you dropped a couple of times while on nights out, and second of all, if you want to make your body look the best it can, you’ll need to find its best angle.
Of course, deciding on your body’s most flattering angle is completely up to you. But before you make any decision, you’ll need to master the one hand grip technique. By that, I mean that you should be able to hold your (probably big) phone well enough to twist and turn it without smashing it on your bedroom’s (or bathroom’s) floor. If you can’t manage to do this, I would recommend buying a PopSocket, just so you can hold your phone safely. While people might also recommend selfie sticks for the same reason, I simply wouldn’t as having an extended arm in the shot might quickly kill the mood.
If you’re not feeling comfortable about the whole selfie situation, make your life easier and buy a tripod. After all, any device that can hold your phone in place and get an upward angle means great butt pics. Just remember to slightly point your butt up.
Now, once you’ve found your best angles and practised your poses, you’ll want to get the right light. If you’re not willing to spend any money on a ring light, simply make sure you’re taking your nudes in a room with as much natural light as possible. Badly lit pictures are just the worst, and neon-like light fixtures scream hospital vibes—it’s safe to say that you don’t want any of that.
Natural lighting can be flattering and give off a carefree daytime nudes attitude that is hot for sure. But it can also be too bright and glaring, which might overshadow your bodylicious bod. To prevent this from happening, try using semi-sheer curtains that will filter the light that comes in your room.
Otherwise, go all out and buy a ring light, which will give your skin a soft glow and will highlight your body’s shapes. Those round LED lights are pretty common among YouTubers and can wash out any blemishes. All you have to do is to put it right in front of you and it will illuminate you perfectly.
Although taking selfies in a mirror gives me war flashbacks from my embarrassing 12-year-old self, there’s a reason we left Paris Hilton’s selfie tricks in the past—it simply was not possible to take selfies without spraining your wrist.
That’s why the classic mirror selfie is your best bet for getting a good nude. Make sure you pick a pretty, full-length mirror near your bed or somewhere you’re sure nothing will be in the way, because no one wants to see your pile of messy clothes or that dying plant standing on your desk.
You’ve got one last task before we let you blossom into the A-class thirst trapper we know you can be: let’s work on those poses. If you look uncomfortable or twisted in all kinds of ways, your nude selfie will fall flat. Pick different poses depending on what you’re trying to highlight. Don’t be shy, do what you want to do—lift one arm, lift the other one, arch your back, turn around—remember, you’re the boss. After trying different poses, find the ones that work for you and repeat! Oh, and make sure you breathe. There’s no pressure here, only sexy vibes.
For new gens, cringey pick up lines made by self-assured men at a bar are but a reality strictly seen in 90s movies. But where OK Boomers associate pick up lines with sketchy bars, new gens associate them with dating apps. We’ve all had one (at least) sent to us. And let’s be honest, some of us have also sent an occasional one to some hot match, too.
When it comes to sparking a conversation with a stranger on an app, pick up lines come in handy—or at least are the easiest, and sometimes worst, way to get that convo flowing. And as virtual conversations on dating apps are currently rising by the millions, with Bumble recording a 26 per cent increase in sent messages in New York alone, more and more ingenious pick up lines are showing up on our radar. That’s why we decided to deep dive through the many pick up lines we’ve seen, from funny pick up lines and dirty ones to lame and cringey ones, and created a compilation of the best pick up lines ever.
As sensitive of a topic the COVID-19 pandemic can be, it’s also good to laugh at the gravity of the situation. It seems like many people using dating apps have already seen the potential in coronavirus pick lines. Here are 5 of the best ones we’ve received:
“Should I spell it COVI-19 or do you want the D?”
“Is that ass a ventilator? Because it’s giving me life right now.”
“Is heaven your quarantine zone? Because you look like an angel.”
“I’m just a girl, standing 6 feet away from a boy, asking him to maybe move back another foot. Thanks.”
“Are you a pandemic? Because you’ve got my heart on lockdown.”
Dirty pick up lines are a risky move. Very few people will appreciate receiving one as a conversation starter, but the ones who dare to use them seriously and successfully deserve a lot of respect.
“Down to wine and 69 if you’re up to drink whiskey and get frisky.”
“Your pics got me hard but your bio made me cum.”
“Have you got home insurance? ‘Cause I’m gonna smash your back door in.”
“Are you a chicken farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.”
“Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you.”
If you ask us, most pick up lines are cringey but sometimes, you get lucky (or unlucky) and end up receiving an extra cringey one. Here are a few of the cringiest pick up lines out there:
“Is your name Earl Grey? Because you look like a hot-tea!”
“If you and I were socks we’d make a great pair.”
“I’m glad I brought my library card with me, ‘cause girl I am checking you out.”
“Do I know you? You look like my next girlfriend… 🙊”
“Let’s play Barbie. I’ll be Ken and you can be the box I come in.”
These ones aren’t real pick up lines, but they’re conversation starters that made us laugh because of how random and weird they sound. Enjoy!
“Out of all the animals in the world, which would you eat its ass?”
“You look like a serial killer.”
“Hello, I’m filth.”
“I have coke and you can call me daddy if you like.”
Pick up lines are very much still part of dating culture, however, new gens have realised how to use them in different ways, without giving them too much credibility or importance. Sending your newest match one horney pick up line as a conversation starter might not sound like the best idea, but, if done the right way, it could be seen as a charming and funny joke.
With the important part that dating apps took in our dating lives came the overflow of boring chats. ‘Hey lovely’ and ‘What’s up?’ are not enough anymore—everyone deserves a bit more than that—pick up lines can sometimes represent that extra effort.
So, what are you waiting for? Try your luck, try to start a conversation with a pick up line (you get some extra points if you use a COVID-19 one).